With the escalating divorce rate and loads of domestic violence cases, many people have resorted to using premarital agreements, to spell out how their assets will be split in case they need a divorce in the future. They reason that it is better to secure the assets they acquired before the marriage, than to risk losing them if they divorce in the future. However, a recent study is revealing that prenup use is not always the best strategy to apply. Here is why:

If both the husband and wife are ideal for each other, and they agree to the mutual needs of safeguarding against financial loss, then the prenup becomes a source of peace of mind to benefit both parties. And this was especially true in circumstances where there is childrens property from the previous marriage, or where one had inherited assets with conditions that would be affected by a divorce. In such special circumstances, a legal contract spelling out this (third party protection) is the right thing to do.

However, due to the high divorce rate, many people have lost their ability to trust. Many have lost confidence in their ability to create a strong and lasting love relationship. Many people are now focusing on protecting their wealth, on the suspicious assumption that their fianc(e) could be a gold digger. Many do not believe that their relationships will last the test of time. Many assume that their fianc(e) is out to get them, and all these negative beliefs and false assumptions are truly fueling marital failure. Yes, a prenup protects the money, but it also programs the mind for failure. Here below are some of the dangers:-

The study found that the party with fewer assets was always left wondering on which of the two agreements held more value. Was it the trial commitment (prenup) or a total commitment (marital vows)? On one hand you have jointly become one in the spirit of family, but on the other hand you do not want to be a party to your spouses liabilities or problems, and s/he is not taking your 401k, your home, your assets, or your heart if s/he wants to quit anytime in the future. During this study, one prenup user who quit the relationship asked these questions: How confident would you feel in a marriage where you are not trusted? How would you feel if your spouse thought you were a gold digger waiting to quit in the future? How joyful would you be in such a love relationship?

They had contradicting needs and expectations from their marriage; one wanted true love, and the other wanted to protect their assets from their spouse. And later, when the husband suggested that they should get a baby, the wife asked him, So how much will you pay me for carrying your child? Sounds fair enough? Are these selfish motives? Commercialized family spirit? You be the judge.

Simply focusing on protecting yourself against financial loss, is now becoming a source of breakdown to many marriages. There is a better way of managing marital risks, than transferring all the risks to the spouse with fewer assets. Your interest should be to protect not only your money, but the core of the family and this includes full protection of your heart, your family, your legacy, and especially your familys peace of mind. And today, you have a simplified and lasting solution to this challenge.

For the first time, you now have an indispensable decision making tool that guides you to foresee and manage the risks and uncertainties in building your love relationship. You now have the quality knowledge and advice which has been missing. You can easily gain the deep understanding you need to possess, to enable you to see the bigger picture, and to make lifetime winning decisions. Now, you can confidently grow a rich and fulfilling love relationship.

The bottom line is: Choosing and Keeping a Lover Successfully are decision making skills you can learn. Staying ignorant of these skills and mismatching basing on a prenup, is not smart at all, especially in this era. Marriage is all predictable. There are 10 critical steps you must learn, if your desire is to make the right decisions that stand the test of time. This life-shaping wisdom is in a workbook titled, 10 Steps to Success in Love and Marriage; Self-Help Secrets for the Smart Lover, by Alex Mugume. It is the best resource for those who desire to gain a deep understanding on this subject.

Alex Mugume is a love teacher and author. He is available for teaching engagements and personal consultations. Visit http://blog.bestlovingskills.com/