If you have ever lost someone dear to you it is likely that you can still summon up the grief that you may still be carrying deep inside yourself as a result of the loss. If this grief, which is usually felt as a deep saddness, is something that you would like to clear in yourself then you may find some hope here.

In this brief passage I would like to address this grief in a way that you have probably never seen or heard of before. Following what comes next may leave you feeling transformed, so I caution you in advance.

Grief:

Is the saddness that is associated with a significant loss (say of another person)

The feeling of loss is, by definition, that which tells us that once there was another person,

Hence the feeling of loss helps to remind us that there once was another person, so that,

We won't forget the other person, so that

We can feel like we are still connected to the other person, so that,

We can feel better in ourselves and feel that we are not alone, so that

We can feel at peace, happy and contented.

So, in summary: (A) The saddness helps us feel connected to the loved one, at peace, happy and contented.

But this is clearly not true is it?

The saddness is there primarily because we have "lost" the other person and are therefore "disconnected" from them. Also, clearly saddness is the opposite of being at peace, feeling happy or contented, isn't it?

Now, if you wish, acknowledge to yourself that (A) is not true and notice how you feel inside.

If you followed this so far you may be feeling some or all of the following:

a) Confused
b) Skeptical
c) Lighter
d) Relief
e) At peace
f) More contented
g) Expansive
h) Enlightened
i) Happier
j) More connected to your loved one but in a happier more desirable way.
k) Have an awareness that you are really "not" separated from your loved one.

If you felt a) or b) above then you are still needing the grief for some reason. If you felt any of the other feelings then I think you already know what this is about.

If you wish to know more then you are free to visit the web site in my bio below.