If you have ever witnessed a small child defiantly exclaim, "You're not the boss of me!" you understand a basic human principle. People don't like to be bossed. Bossing conjures up visions of a dictatorial "do it my way or the highway" approach.

As a manager or owner of an organization, you must understand that leadership is situational. In other words, different situations demand different approaches. So, there are times when "the boss" needs to lay down the law of the land. But this approach should be reserved for specific instances when collaboration is not a prudent option.

Your ultimate job as a leader is to grow away from bossing and toward coaching. The rewards will be higher morale, better teamwork, more accountability, and more creativity from your staff. It also means less work and stress on you.

Here are a few things you can do to be a better coach:

* Celebrate achievement - Bosses believe that their job is to detect and point out errors. A coach on the other hand knows the value in celebrating learning and achievement.

* Don't give out the answers - As the boss, it's easy to play the wise sage when your staff comes to you with problems. Instead, put on your coaching hat and ask them for the right answers. It will help them grow in their positions and enhance their value to the organization.

* Empower your people - If you believe you should control other people by the decisions they make, you are a boss. If you believe that you should facilitate others to make decisions and empower them to implement those decisions, you are a coach.

* Seek to understand, then to be understood - A boss will often interact with others by telling, lecturing and directing. A coach, on the other hand, will engage others through dialogue by asking, listening and requesting.

* Focus on the process - A boss believes you should focus on the bottom-line. A coach believes in focusing on the processes that creates the bottom-line results.